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People could invite whomever they wanted, but the main rule was, for the first few hours, the space had to be only men that identified as black and gay, and that other people could join after 3pm. Over time, the brunch become a safe space for us, who generally felt like we had none — not in LGBT spaces, and not in black ones. Brunch is our place to breath a little easier. Recently, one of the people that is a leader in making this brunch continue — now with less frequency — and I were talking about the love lives of the men involved.

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While same-sex marriage is a fairly recent development — it just became legal nationwide in late June — we do have some data that gives insight into potential trends within the make-up of same-sex couples. And surprisingly, they look to already be more diverse — racially — than their heterosexual counterparts. It could be, he said, that a smaller pool of potential partners makes LGBT people less hesitant to date someone from a different ethnicity or culture. The LGBT community — most specifically, the gay, male community as a whole — has come under fire lately for minimizing the racism that has long pervaded its ranks, with some Pride celebrations disrupted by Black Lives Matters representatives, there to remind the gay community of its racially diverse roots.

Oh, and the constant obsession with painting black people as more homophobic even though most all anti-gay policies and laws have been led by white men.

So this idea — that LGBT minorities may be more comfortable being in relationships with white people than straight ones, even though the greater gay community has long been exclusionary — is bizarre and deserves some meditation. We as gay men, as people who have been fighting for so long to be seen as deserving of equality, have decided that we were willing to bring racism forward as long as what we imagined to be homophobia lessened.

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And I am starting to think that this self-reinforcing racism could be part of the higher rates of interracial coupling in our community. Log in to get trip updates and message other travelers.

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